Reddit Dating In College
Ever since I was a young girl, I made it a goal to be engaged by college graduation.
Since it's college, you're going to notice guys starting to be a little more 'adult', especially toward the end of their college years. They'll get haircuts regularly, shave regularly, dress better, and wear form-fitting clothes. Again, not everyone does, but it's something you might notice. I found my dating life got a lot better after I graduated since I had more time to go on dates but I still had a social life in college. I would definitely recommend trying to find time to date or at least make friends. No one can be that busy, and if you are, see if there are some things that are holding you back. Since it's college, you're going to notice guys starting to be a little more 'adult', especially toward the end of their college years. They'll get haircuts regularly, shave regularly, dress better, and wear form-fitting clothes. Again, not everyone does, but it's something you might notice. TL;DR - I think college is too volatile of a time period in a person's life, full of meaningful change and personal growth, to pursue long-lasting committed relationships. Even if you as an individual feel ready, its likely that your entire peer group has too much going on to reciprocate.
When I moved away to attend one of the biggest universities in the South, I had dreams of meeting that special someone and earning not just a degree, but also a lifetime of romance.
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I'd meet my future husband in class, a club event or through friends, and he'd ask for my hand in marriage by the time we walked across the stage four years later.
I found myself swooning over the engagement pictures of my friends and fellow classmates, wondering when it would finally be my turn. They were all getting married already or getting proposed to.
But the truth is, it is becoming increasingly more difficult to find our special someones.
In a world full of the latest and greatest social media platforms, many of us are taking to the internet to find love. With dating apps, such as Tinder and Bumble, the world of matchmaking took a turn.
To add to the dating stress, much of society is starting to turn back the clock when it comes to love. Marriage was (and still is) something expected of women, especially those living in the South. Family gatherings were full of people asking whom I was dating, how exclusive I was with guys and how much longer until someone finally put a ring on it.
With more and more people getting married at young ages, many felt the pressure to spend their college years looking for a spouse.
And while I had met a few guys in college and went on a few dates, I was still unable to find that special someone I had spent my whole childhood wishing on stars for.
However, these couples defied the odds, proving it is still possible to find that special someone in college. Here, they share their stories:
1. We lived down the hall from each other.
We lived down the hallway from each other and met on move-in day at a dorm. We went to a party together later that week, and he nonchalantly grabbed my hand. We dated for a couple months, broke up and got back together the following August (first day of move-in sophomore year). We got married seven years later.
— Violet, 32
2. We met on Reddit.
I actually met my husband on Reddit. He put out an ad in search of friends close to where I lived, so I replied to his post, thinking I would gain another friend. We talked for a few weeks and finally agreed to meet up and hang out.The moment we met, we automatically clicked. We talked about anything and everything. I got butterflies every time we held hands. Everything moved pretty fast, and we moved in together after that.We've been married for two months now, after being together for two years, and I've never been happier.
— Rachel, 26
3. We met while our friends were dating.
We were both a wingman/woman for our best friends who liked each other. We were dragged along on a couple of dates to make it less awkward for them. We ended up getting married, and they only dated for six months.
— Mary, 27
4. His music brought us together.
We met sophomore year while living across the hall in a co-ed dorm. He was always playing guitar — the same song over and over. I got so aggravated, so I put a note under his door about how terrible it was: 'Please learn a new song!' We dated for four years before getting married, and now, we're coming up on 19 years.
— Brenda, 44
5. We met on the internet.
OkCupid actually! Our campus was so big, and we had different majors. We probably would have never met each other without it.It was really great because we kind of both knew what we were interested in before the first date. It was better that way instead of meeting some guy you don't know anything about at a bar. It gives women more freedom to choose what kind of guy they want.
— Allison, 27
6. We were in the same class.
We met in an elective class at the college we both went to — same major but different minors. This was part of his minor, and I took the class for fun. I got more than I expected, happily. We will be married in September.
— Olivia, 24
7. We met on Craigslist.
Craigslist. Now, I know that sounds creepy, but it really wasn't. We lived about a mile apart off campus and met for dinner at a restaurant nearby.
— Harry, 26
8. I swiped right.
OK, so we met on Tinder. I always thought it was kind of silly. I was never into online dating stuff. But my friends and I were playing around with it, and I started talking to this one girl who went to my school. We hit it off and met up at a restaurant near our college.She was even more beautiful in person. That night, I knew I would marry that girl. A year later, we're engaged.
— Ben, 25
9. We met a frat party.
I met my husband at a mixer with another fraternity. I was actually talking to a different guy who was drunk and falling around everywhere, and my current husband came over to get him off me.We talked all night, and then, we both drove the guy home before we went to Sonic for milkshakes. He asked for my number that night, and the rest is history.
— Kendra, 26
10. I convinced her to study with me.
She was gorgeous. I was in the back corner of the room, and she was in the middle. Even from that angle, I could tell how beautiful she was. She always wore one of those old-fashioned Cubs emblem hats with the bear and the bat.I was a grown man, going back for a second degree, already with a good career, and even then, I was intimidated.I remember thinking day after day, 'How do I start up a conversation with her?'One day, as I walked into class, I overheard her talking about glassblowing. I thought, 'I watch PBS! I can come up with something about glass blowing!'I knew literally nothing about glassblowing other than it looked hot. As we left class that day, I stopped her and said, 'Hey, I overheard you saying something about glassblowing? I've always thought that was really neat.'
We chatted for a few minutes and went on our separate ways, and I was practically floating on cloud nine.Then, she didn't come back to class for a month, and disappointment abounded. I was walking to class one day, and I saw her! She was studying on a MacBook. ANOTHER CHANCE!I walked up to her and said, 'Hey! I haven't seen you for a while. Did you know we have a test this week?' I offered to help her study, and she accepted.We met at the library late that night. We studied until the library closed and went back to her place to keep studying.We studied all night, and she made me breakfast. I went home so excited for the future the next morning. We went out on a real date a few days later. She's still beautiful, but I never did learn much about glassblowing.
— Doc, 32
11. We were at a house party.
I met her at a Super Bowl party freshman year. One friend lived in a house, so a big group of us were so glad to get out of the dorms for a party. I got there, and there were all these women I'd not met before, so it was, like, wow!I talked to this one girl with beautiful eyes a fair amount, and she seemed to be interested in me, too. She was helping cook burgers using the broiler, and she pulled them out, spilled some grease and caught the oven on fire. So naturally, I thought, this is the woman for me!OK, so that's the funny way I tell the tale. But she's actually very gifted at cooking.
— Brian, 29
This article was originally published on The Southern Chic.
College Life
When people think of college, parties, schoolwork and romance come to mind.
When I graduated from high school, I felt like I was finally in a place where I was ready to dedicate the time and commitment necessary to being in a relationship. I met a few guys who I liked when I went away. After a few months into my first year of college, I started dating someone who I thought could really make me happy.
At first, everything was going great. I finally felt like I had met someone who actually understood me and cared for me. He always walked me home after a date to make sure I got home safe. We could talk about anything, and it felt like we understood each other completely. It was magic.
Unfortunately, all that changed a few weeks later. We broke up. It turns out he was just like every guy I've met thus far in college: selfish and self-absorbed.
I had had crushes on a few other guys before I finally settled into that relationship, but every one of them seemed to have this similar way of thinking that I could not understand. They all believed dating was trivial, and that having feelings for someone was weak. They wanted to hook up with as many girls as possible, and didn't care about who they were hurting along the way.
It was hard to pull apart and try to comprehend. That is, until one day. I finally realized the importance of each of these people in my life. One failed relationship and many crushes later, I came to the realization that all of the guys I've ever been interested in have taught me important lessons about life and relationships.
Reddit Dating In College Sports
Here are the five things no one ever told me about dating in college:
1. Not everyone dates exclusively.
In high school, everyone knows everything. Relationships are rarely kept secrets, and couples become obvious when pairs walk hand-in- hand down the hallway. Since these relationships are publicly known, dating exclusively is never a question. It is simply established and assumed.
Once I got to college, each guy I was into made it clear that we weren't exclusive. So if we were seeing other people, it would just be “whatever.” I wanted to simultaneously pull my hair out and scream.
Everyone says not to overgeneralize people, but the guys I've met in college have only wanted hookups. Most of them seem to hate the idea of any type of commitment.
It's frustrating, and it can seem impossible to get through the never-ending stream of terrible guys. However, I'm optimistic that there are nice guys in college who do want relationships. They can't all be the same.
2. Dating requires time management.
College is nowhere near as structured and organized as high school is. The day doesn't start and end at the same time for everybody. Instead, people's days begin when their first classes are scheduled, and they end after their last classes, meetings or practice.
There's so much you can get involved in while you're in college. Having a schedule that complements that of your boyfriend's is nearly impossible. There will even be days when too much work makes it difficult for you to see each other at all.
You'll get frustrated and feel defeated. But that time apart can make your relationship grow stronger. It will make your time together feel more valuable. It will get better as long as both people in the relationship try to make time for each other.
3. Some relationships will end up being long-distance.
Dating In College Tips
When you find someone you really like, there is an instantaneous desire to constantly be with that person. College can be such a big, intimidating place that the opportunity to find someone who really understands you may seem like an impossible feat.
Unfortunately, not every guy you truly like and care about will always live in close proximity to your hometown. If he does, then you're one of the lucky ones. When you meet someone you like while you're away at school, it's likely that neither of you will think about the summer that could separate you.
Reddit Dating In College Students
When summer seems forever away, it's easy to ignore. But once spring kicks in and the final stretch of the year draws near, the pressure of your impending long-distance relationship sets in.
4. Don't date anyone who lives on your floor.
This seems really obvious, but it can be a difficult rule to stick to sometimes. I have never participated in 'floorcest,' but I have friends who have dated people who live on their dorm floors. Their horror stories have become my cautionary tales.
The awkward stares when you walk past one another in the hallway, and the dirty looks that get exchanged when one of you brings another person home for the night are not worth enduring. Just date the cute guy in your Spanish class. You'll save yourself a lot of trouble.
5. Luxurious dates don't always happen like they do in the movies.
In college, money is an issue for everybody. Most of it is spent on textbooks, classes and takeout. So, while your first few dates with someone new might be really nice, some of your dates will be much simpler, like sitting in the dorms while watching movies, for example.
Dating After College
For those of us who want a whirlwind romance similar to the ones we've seen on the big screen, it's hard not to fantasize about magical dates where your potential new guy will sweep you off your feet with some huge, romantic gesture. This isn't realistic in college.
Every date should be magical because of the person you're with. Your happiness shouldn't depend on whether or not your date took you to some fancy restaurant.
Dating Advice Reddit
Just enjoy spending time with your guy. If you really like each other, you won't need the backdrop of a restaurant to enjoy one another's company.